Attitude, page 2

Attitude, page 1 | 2 | 3 | 4
The difference between salt and your opinion is I sometimes ask for salt Please wait, sarcasm loading
I'm fluent in 3 languages: English, Sarcasm and Profanity It's call Buzz Off and you'll find it right over there
I'm like a cannibal in that I'm fed up with people Hello, my name is Trouble
I don't fully understand your kind of crazy but I do admire it If there's one thing that really annoys me, it's everything
Sorry, it's not my day to care You don't have to agree with me. Go ahead and be wrong
I don't plan on being sarcastic today but don't worry, it requires no planning A list of all those asking for your opinion:
I'm not bossy I just have better ideas Oh, I just realized... who cares?
Gone Medieval. Back In 20 Minutes I can no longer pretend you're not an idiot
Sarcasm - it's not just for breakfast anymore Sarcasm: More acceptable than its felonious alternatives
Keep talking, I'm just going to take a little nap I get paid to be nice at work Don't be looking for freebies
I don't do mornings! To save time, let's just agree that I know everything
My attitude today is brought to you by the letters F and U Gee, I'd like to care, but I don't possess that gene.
I never think about what you think about me Don't you think if I were wrong I'd know it?
An unkind word can ruin someone's day so try to string a few together and see if you can wreck their whole week Bite my shiny metal ass!
Just pretend I'm not here. That's what I'm doing Allow me to confirm that I do not care
Can you skip to the part where I care? If I didn't have sarcasm I'd need bail money
I demand honesty at all times when you have something positive  to say about me I don't suffer fools, I make fools suffer
Am I perfect? No. But do I strive each day to be better? Also no. Before you criticize me, understand that I don't care
Not now, but soon -Stewie Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand
I'd agree with you but then we'd both be wrong I'm not good at empathy, will you settle for sarcasm?
Don't let the name Captain Heartless fool you.  I'm not a real captain pretending to be interested
I may be going to Hell but it'll be on a full scholarship How about never? Is never good for you?
Someone out there cares  Not me, but someone. Maybe. There are 7,130,000,000 people in the world. I like maybe 6 of them
Warning! I may be hazardous to your emotional well being What I don't give... (Rat's ass)
When in doubt I like to err on the side of awesome I'm one of those bad things that happens to good people
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