Declarations, page 5

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I love me Yesterday I did nothing and today I'm finishing it up
I'm not insane, my mother had me tested I enjoy conveying amusing and/or insightful thoughts within a limited rectangular space
Conformity makes me comfortable I can get you a toe -Walter
I'd be nothing if I didn't have haters to motivate me I didn't make it to the gym today. That makes seven years in a row
Of course I can keep a secret. It’s the people I tell it to who can’t I like soup
Automatic doors make me feel like a Jedi I've learned so much from my mistakes I plan to make lots more
If you think I'm a bitch, allow me to introduce you to my mother My principles are not for sale unless you are offering cash
Just another Trekkie living with my parents I'm not procrastinating, I'm avoiding
Whatever it is, I'm against it Will make YouTube videos for food
I take full responsibility for my actions except the ones that are someone else's fault I all-caps love you!
I am not responsible for your happiness I can see infinity from my house
I used to care, but they have pills for that now I'm not weird, I'm limited edition
What others take 2 hours to do I can do in a single day I'm not afraid of the dark, I'm afraid of all the things hiding in the dark
I like to give advice. It's how I test it before using it myself My plan B is to keep trying my plan A until it works
I’m only a teacher for the money and the fame Thankful
Advertising helps me decide! I don't start trouble It just seems to be there when I arrive
When I start a diet, the second day is easier because I’m off it by then I think we'll be friends forever because I hate meeting new people
I spend my time finding new ways to waste it I'm not rich in terms of money or in terms of anything else that might count or be of value
I think, therefore I'm dangerous I am not obligated to make sense to you
I was told there would be cake I think this is one of those times
People say I'm selfish but I always think of others when I'm in need I’m never too busy to complain I’m too busy
I cannot quit for I am too legit My favorite workout combines a lunge and a crunch. I call it Lunch
Being your friend is like riding in a roller coaster with loose wheels I’m not against it. But I’m not for it
I refuse to argue with anyone who can't even write in cursive Strongly agree
I don’t think much therefore I might not be
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