Wordplay

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In case of fire do not use elevators. Use water Do not put statements in the negative form
clones are people two Anosmia stinks
I dyslexia love Nice dyslexics finish salt
Don't put off until tomorrow that which y I would never sell out unless I got a lot of money for it
A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother There's a time for optimism and a time for pessimism. This is not one of them
370HSSV 0773H Between you and I, we need an objective case
Spellcheckers aren't worth a shirt Anything worth doing is worth doing write
Avoid cliches like the plague Good eye might - Congratulations, you now speak Australian
I never apologize. I'm sorry but that's just how I am I pink therefore I ham
Abstinence? I gave it up My favorite memories are of the past
The difference between 'I am good' and 'I am god' is either a typo or cocaine The IRS
Mean people are not average Vampires suck
When my parents learned I was bipolar they sent me to a magnet school AIBOHPHOBIA: the fear of palindromes
We must address the homeless Prepositions are not words to end a sentence with
I'm completely reliable sometimes I'm glad I'm not judgmental like all you smug, superficial idiots
I will not tolerate intolerance I never finish anythi
I killed a pumpkin just to see it pie Ah, the noble hot dog, which feeds the hand that bites it
Jesuszilla, son of Godzilla Never believe generalizations
The few. The browed. The Klingons. Descartes may have been right, but I doubt it
I will not obsess Rap music sounds worse than it is
Diarrhea is hereditary, it runs in your jeans My doctor didn't want to see me gain more weight so I gave him a blindfold
Without the Venetians it would have been curtins for all of us Poetry is backwards: it's written inverse
They say ignorance and apathy often go together, but I don't know and I don't care Being a mime means never having to say "I'm sorry"
Suicide? That's the last thing I'd ever do This is not a drill
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