Admontions, page 2

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Admonitions, page 1 | 2 | 3
Never cater to crazy. Crazy is never satisfied Never do anything you wouldn't do in a parallel universe
IF ALL ELSE FAILS USE A BIGGER HAMMER Don't drink to drown your sorrow. Sorrow knows how to swim.
Friends don't let friends shop drunk Never miss a good chance to shut up
Don't confuse honesty with a lack of opportunity to steal something big Don't ask the barber whether you need a haircut
Never make someone your priority when you are merely their option Let the sermon finish before you cook the missionary
Don't do meth Don't expect
Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth Don't let school interfere with your education
Don't say always, don't say never Do not chide me
Never kiss opportunity with a dirty mouth -Russian proverb Don't force it
Don't be hatin' Be not inhospitable to strangers lest they be angels in disguise
If all else fails... more duct tape! Never interrupt your adversary when he is making a mistake
Never settle with words what you can settle with a flame thrower Never test the depth of the water with both feet
Accept no substitutes Harm none
You don't have to attend every argument you're invited to Don't eat your soul to fill your belly
When choosing a path in life try to avoid the psychopaths Don't call Pluto a dwarf. It prefers "Little Planet"
Never underestimatew the value of running away Don't ask
Don't put off until tomorrow what can be put off even longer Let's never err on the side of caution
Assume nothing Don't cling to a mistake just because you spent a lot of time making it
Don't let success go to your head or failure go to your heart Beware the fury of a patient man
Never have a heart attach while playing charades When all else fails, lower your standards
Don't over think Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need more
Never underestimate a mother's ability to figure stuff out Never trust anyone who is happy all the time
Just because you have one doesn't mean you have to be one Don't kid yourself
Never go to a young doctor or an old barber When waiting for your ship to come in, don't be at the airport
If it involves a meatloaf and a plunger, don't do it The best way to avoid being disillusioned is to avoid illusions
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