Tribulations, page 2

Tribulations, page 1 | 2 | 3 | 4
Monday is a rotten way to spend 1/7 of your life Of course I'm out of my mind, it's dark and scary in there!
Sorry. You've mistaken me for someone with potential Ahh, I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again
Same crap different day Just tell Nemo you couldn't find him because you were getting high. He'll understand.
I tried to child-proof the house but my kids found a way back in My bad decisions haunt me
There is no bright side My imaginary friend filed a restraining order against me
Your arguments are subtly flawed I despair, therefore oh, nevermind, it doesn't matter
My psychiatrist says I'm paranoid but he's just out to get me Why is there always so much month left at the end of the money?
I drink so much coffee because I don't get enough sleep because I drink so much coffee All this pain and still no gain
When did cake learn to talk, and how does it know my name? My mood ring isn't a fashion statement, it's a court order
Oh-oh. Time to repress another memory Eyelashes are to keep stuff out of your eye but half of what gets in there is eyelashes
The only problem with doing nothing, I never know when I'm done Do something right, no one remembers. Do something wrong, no one forgets
They tell you to be yourself then they judge you for it You are being lied to
Urinal cakes aren't really cakes I'm against protesting. I just don't know how to show it
I've noticed a common thread in all my problems... me I got a new pair of skinny jeans, they're my old regular jeans
The worst part of Monday is hearing you complain about Mondays I had too much to dream last night
So much to do, so few people to do it for me Damned if you do bored if you don't
Help, I'm making mistakes faster than I can learn from them I'm having an out-of-money experience
I had friends on that Death Star This would be funny if I wasn't clinically depressed
My life is a romantic comedy minus the romance and the comedy Coffee isn't helping, get the jumper cables
Opportunity once knocked at my door but it was looking for someone else Just when I think I'm winning the rat race, along come faster rats
I thought credit limit was just a suggestion Is everything that expensive or am I just that poor?
Chocolate makes my clothes shrink Why do they want dinner every single night?
I'd start working out but I don't have a good Before picture yet I think some of my choices may have been ill considered
I'm so stressed I'm getting on my own nerves Today is the tomorrow you forgot to plan for yesterday
There aren't enough hours in the day to put off all the things I don't want to do If each day is a gift today was underpants
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