Living & Dead, page 4

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Life is one long test constantly interrupted by pop quizzes I'm at an age where most of my comments start "I'm at an age where"
The three stages of life:: 1.Birth 2.Huh? 3.Death Beware the barrenness of a busy life –Socrates
The meaning of life is that it stops -Kafka With age comes wisdom* (*Arthritis and 30 lbs of fat)
What matters most in life are quotes saying what matters in life None are so old as those who have outlived enthusiasm -Thoreau
Just when I'm old enough to have my head together, my body starts falling apart! I'm waiting for the plot twist where my life makes sense
My life is an endless battle against maturity The best thing about the good old days I wasn't old and I didn't try to be good
I thought getting old would take longer What happens after you die? Lots of things, just not with you
Life is like an elevator, you may need to let some people off along the way What doesn't kill you merely postpones the inevitable
Old enough to know better, too young to care Don't try to cheat death, he will hunt you down and kill you
Life is too short to live someone else's dreams I'm thinking of faking my own life
Life is like Tetris fit in too well, you disappear Dear Life, I've learned you're not fair. Please stop teaching me that lesson
They say such nice things at funerals, it's sad to think we all miss our own by so few days Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans
Life is too short to knit with cheap yarn You’re older than the Internet? Big deal. I’m older than area codes
Live forever? No thanks, I don’t even like to stay late at parties Being an adult is mostly feeling tired all the time and telling people how tired you are and listening to them tell you how tired they are
Life’s a trip, enjoy the ride If you think pushing 40 is hard, wait till you start dragging it
Youth is fleeting but immaturity can last a lifetime Don't grow up it's a trap!
Death is nature's way of telling you to slow down Don’t let being old get you down. It’s too hard to get back up
Becoming an adult is like getting a job promotion with too  much responsibility and too little pay It's not the dying that bothers me it's the not being here anymore
Aged to perfection Life is a shipwreck but we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats -Voltaire
Does your whole body hurt and you’re not dying? Congratulations, you’re an adult You know you’re old when you get aches from sitting still
I can't have a Midlife Crisis I'm too busy with my Wholelife Crisis I’m at the age when getting lucky means remembering why I walked into the room
The number one rule to live by is: Don’t Die Seriously, Life, if you would like to give me lemons I would prefer that instead of all this other crap
My favorite childhood memory is my back not hurting Adulthood: Where you’re always tired except at bedtime
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