Modern Thought, page 2
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Money can't buy you happiness but it'll let you be unhappy in nicer places Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once
Friends may come and go but enemies accumulate A smart lawyer knows the law, a smarter one knows the judge
Pessimists are just reformed optimists Happiness is good health and a bad memory
A party tonight is better than a party tomorrow night Playtime is never over
A narcissist is someone better looking than you are -Gore Vidal Nothing ever looks like the picture
The wheel stops for no hamster It's easier to resist temptation when you know it'll still be there later
The favorite tie attracts the gravy A hammock is a net that captures tranquility
Some mistakes are too much fun to make only once There's a fine line between caution and paranoia
There is no such thing as fun for the whole family Wondering if you're happy is a great shortcut to being depressed
Those who can only spell a word one way lack imagination Spandex. A privilege not a right
A book makes a chair more comfortable Knowledge is knowing tomatoes are a fruit, wisdom is not putting them in a fruit salad
It's all fun and games until somebody gets the cone Do unto others is bad advice to a masochist
Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects. _Will Rogers A psychotic is a guy who just found out what's going on. -William S. Burroughs
It's not settling if it's the best you can do Ignorance is just knowledge you didn't know you don't have
It isn't homework unless it's due tomorrow Sacred Cows make the best burgers
Anything is possible with the right attitude and some duct tape The remaining work increases as the deadline approaches
Money isn't the key to happiness but you can use that money to have a key made A diamond is forever and so are the payments
We must learn from our mistakes of the past to improve our mistakes in the future Tact is for those who lack the wit for sarcasm
Children, drunks and leggings always tell the truth Originality is the art of concealing your sources
It's easier to stay out of trouble than to get out Time is an annoying concept contrived by linear minds
Napping can prevent aging if you do it while driving Opposites Attack
The shortest distance between two points is usually under construction Being a grown up should never be more than a part time job
Being part of the solution is for people not cool enough to be part of the problem Reality: Worst game ever
An optimist thinks this is the best possible world. A pessimist fears that this is true Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation
A closed mouth gathers no feet Alchohol preserves everything but dignity
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