Modern Thought, page 2
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Some mistakes are too much fun to make only once It's not settling if it's the best you can do
A smart lawyer knows the law, a smarter one knows the judge Napping can prevent aging if you do it while driving
Pessimists are just reformed optimists Opposites Attack
It isn't homework unless it's due tomorrow Those who can only spell a word one way lack imagination
A narcissist is someone better looking than you are -Gore Vidal Sacred Cows make the best burgers
Playtime is never over Ignorance is just knowledge you didn't know you don't have
The favorite tie attracts the gravy A hammock is a net that captures tranquility
Spandex. A privilege not a right There's a fine line between caution and paranoia
There is no such thing as fun for the whole family Wondering if you're happy is a great shortcut to being depressed
Do unto others is bad advice to a masochist Knowledge is knowing tomatoes are a fruit, wisdom is not putting them in a fruit salad
A book makes a chair more comfortable This too shall pass. Like a kidney stone, maybe, but it will pass
A psychotic is a guy who just found out what's going on. -William S. Burroughs Anything is possible with the right attitude and some duct tape
Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects. _Will Rogers It's all fun and games until somebody gets the cone
Being a grown up should never be more than a part time job Money isn't the key to happiness but you can use that money to have a key made
Reality: Worst game ever A diamond is forever and so are the payments
The shortest distance between two points is usually under construction The remaining work increases as the deadline approaches
We must learn from our mistakes of the past to improve our mistakes in the future Originality is the art of concealing your sources
It's easier to stay out of trouble than to get out Alchohol preserves everything but dignity
Children, drunks and leggings always tell the truth An optimist thinks this is the best possible world. A pessimist fears that this is true
Sitting is the new smoking Time is an annoying concept contrived by linear minds
Plagiarism is the most devious form of flattery It's never too late to give up
A closed mouth gathers no feet Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation
Being part of the solution is for people not cool enough to be part of the problem The hardest part of parenting is the first 40 years
The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate it If there's a 50/50 chance something can go wrong, 9 times out of 10 it will
Everyone is someone's disappointment There is nothing so permanent as a temporary solution that works
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