Modern Thought, page 5
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If you don't have a Plan B, you don't have a plan Common sense, like deodorant, is noticed most when it isn't used
Opportunity always looks bigger behind you than ahead of you Success requires hard work so, there goes that idea
There is no excuse for the pronunciation of colonel There is no such thing as too many tools
What doesn’t kill you sometimes makes you wish it had PASTE ALT HERE
Anything can be funny if it happens to someone else An exclamation point is like laughing at your own joke -F. Scott Fitzgerald
No good deed goes unpunished If at first you don't succeed, redefine success
It’s not hoarding if it’s books Better Late than having to be there the whole time
The first thing to have instant replay was books Packages of batteries should be labeled “Gift not included”
Parties: For when you want to clean up twice in 12 hours If life were fair, sarcasm would burn calories
Now is the new later Art is anything you can get away with. -Andy Warhol
An acquaintance is just a friend you haven't scared away yet Life comes without instructions, that's why we have fathers
Expensive paintings are just trading cards for the rich The difference between in-laws and outlaws: outlaws are wanted
Laughter is not the best medicine for incontinence Sometimes a road is less traveled for a good reason
If you ain't different, you ain't normal Procrastination is a dish best served tomorrow
A writer is someone for whom writing is more difficult than for other people. –Thomas Mann Having weird parents builds character
Mediocre is the new excellent The worst vice is advice
The future doesn't need us Coffee is so much better when no one talks while you drink it
Everything in moderation unless no one is looking Junk is the unused stuff you've had for years and won't need until you throw it out
The best way to save face is to keep the lower part of it shut Any pizza is a personal pizza if you believe in yourself
College memories last forever I mean student loan payments Compromise is the satisfactory distribution of dissatisfaction
Reality is where bad things happen Sooner or later we all quote our mothers
Sleep is a poor substitute for coffee Only a proton can stay positive all the time
The biggest corporate lies are the serving size on food packages The obscure, we see eventually. The completely obvious, it seems, takes longer -Edward R. Murrow
Everyone has value - if only as a bad example Synonym: A word you use in place of the one you can't spell
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