Internet Bumper Stickers Wordplay, page 5

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I don't trust stairs, I think they're up to something Game, set, match = tennis. Set, match, run = arson
Always give 100% (except when donating blood) Volunteering doesn't pay
PMS jokes aren't funny. Period. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive
Think outside the box (catbox) What part of floccinaucinihilipilification don't you understand?
Apathy. Who cares? I have not yet begun to procrastinate
Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use One good turn gets the most blanket
I spend 300% of my time exaggerating I'm a man of few
Nothing is impossible except for the things that can't be done Those who ignore history are doomed to repeat it. Same for your other classes.
It's not the minutes at the table that make you fat, it's the seconds This sticker no verb
I'd like to have a sex change ... from none to a lot Logic tells us that dishonesty is still the second-best policy
Heisenberg may have slept here I. Am. Not. Tryng. To. Make. A. Point. I. Have. Asthma.
I was hurt falling into an upholstery machine but I'm recovered now Single and looking
Down with pants! Up with kilts! I'm not feeling myself today may I feel you?
My greatest fear is to dwell forever in obscurity -Unknown I'm so excited for gardening season I wet my plants!
Stream of incontinence: when you won't shut up about the pissy mood you're in I'd help the homeless but I don't know where they live
No, I'm NOT reflexively negative! Great minds like a think
In the event of a plane crash it's safest to be far away from any planes One nation under Canada
Eliminate and abolish redundancy Hey Fox News! So far, no news about foxes. What's up with that?
One problem you can't solve by throwing money at it is being out of throwing money Do my body-image issues make me look fat?
I love polygamy WYMI: The all-philosophy radio station
I'm taking steps to avoid elevators I know I'd be a great motivational speaker, but why bother?
Does the Little Mermaid wear an alegbra? Ointment This is a topical bumper sticker
When you boil it all down, that's evaporation You can't live on Food stamps they have no nutrition and taste bad
Gravity is keeping me down I'm a social vegan, I avoid meet
If you want my respect, get on your knees and beg for it. Now is always the right time to do things later
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